Wilbert. Huh, how do you explain Wilbert. Or better yet, how do I explain how I get myself into these things. Actually this one...I had good reason for taking Wilbert. Wilbert belonged to my best friend and landlord Diana's son. He was the first of the two Pot Bellied Pigs that they just had to have and then dumped...on me, But I digress. When Diana asked me if I would be willing to take this five yr old Pot Belly Pig I said, "suuuure, how much trouble could a pig be." Naive fool that I am.
Now you need to understand two things...my horses had never seen a pig before and Wilbert looooooved horses. Is the picture forming in your mind? Wilbert had been raised from a baby with Rosie's (Diana's daughter in law) horse as his sole companion. Rosie had decided that she didn't want the horse anymore and sold it never thinking for a minute that it would be a problem. Why would that be a problem you might ask? Well, Wilbert was not in a fenced yard, so when he lost his friend he decided to go visit the neighbors horses...the neighbors were complaining...loudly. What mean, horrible neighbors I thought. Why on earth would that be a problem? Creeps! Did I mention that I was a naive fool?
Wilbert arrived on a Saturday, we backed the trailer up to the pen and he offloaded easily...piece of cake, right?! So I gave him a day or so to settle in and had so much fun feeding him. Hey, he was kind of cute. Then I went into his pen. He was no longer cute. Rosie had said how sweet he was and how much he loved being brushed and loved on....hmmm, maybe they didn't bring me the right pig I thought as he stood there BARKING at me and pawing the ground like a freaking bull. But ever the optimist I proceeded forward. Then HE CHARGED ME!! Now I have to say that there is nothing funny about a knee high 250lb pig running at you, full blast while barking. What may have been a bit funny was me in full retreat going over the fence backward. Hmm...time to regroup.
The horses were not excited about Wilbert. Well, they were excited all right but not in a good way. My mare April was in the front paddock so had the best view of this snorting...thing...that made these weeee weeeeie noises and barked. She refused to even go into her stall and did not eat for the first week. In general they viewed this...thing...with abject horror.
Fast forward about three weeks time, during which Wilbert and I came to terms with each other (it involved a rake handle applied, gently of course, to his snout, some screaming on my part and a lot of donuts.) I, in all my great wisdom, decided I would let Wilbert out for a few hours, you know, so he could have a break...wow, did you know how fast a pig can run!!!! Holy *#!!#*! The really bad thing about this is how hard I laughed. Not very nice I know, but in all honesty, I was laughing so hard I couldn't do anything. I was literally weak with laughter.
Okay, so, remember how I said Wilbert loooooved horses? He made a beeline straight for the back 40 and the horse pens. Poor, poor, April! Well, no problem, I thought. She is fenced in. Hah, more naivete. That darn pig walked up to the fence of April's stall, (much to her total horror) stuck his snout under the bottom of the wire and lifted. Ping, ping, ping, ping. The 2" staples holding the wire into the post popped out like gunshot, the wire folded up....and he was in!!! (Ummm, oh, hmmm, maybe that was the problem the neighbors had with him) He paused for a moment, seeming to smile and then swung that ugly head around, "ah, my friend" he said, and headed straight for April who was already cowering in the corner. With great delight, squealing and grunting as only a pig can do, he ran for her. She bolted, running for her life with Wilbert in hot pursuit. Around and around her pen they ran, he in delight, she in terror. The other horses all began running in their pens, screaming, as they watched while the "thing" attacked as they had surely feared it might. Now, April was a little mare, only about 14.2 hands, but let me tell you...when she got a straight line at that 5' fence I could see that all the schooling I had done over fences with her had paid off! She cleared that fence like it wasn't there. I finally stopped laughing enough to grab the rake handle and managed to chase Wilbert back up into the barnyard and close the big gate that he couldn't lift up and we all survived that first contact.
He stood by that gate for days though and I never did get him back in his pen. But before he was done there WAS a hole, pig sized, in every paddock fence.
Oops, this was supposed to be about the neighbors and Clovis PD. Sorry, I do get carried away. I'll finish this later.
And then remind me to tell you about burying Ezra.
Now you need to understand two things...my horses had never seen a pig before and Wilbert looooooved horses. Is the picture forming in your mind? Wilbert had been raised from a baby with Rosie's (Diana's daughter in law) horse as his sole companion. Rosie had decided that she didn't want the horse anymore and sold it never thinking for a minute that it would be a problem. Why would that be a problem you might ask? Well, Wilbert was not in a fenced yard, so when he lost his friend he decided to go visit the neighbors horses...the neighbors were complaining...loudly. What mean, horrible neighbors I thought. Why on earth would that be a problem? Creeps! Did I mention that I was a naive fool?
Wilbert arrived on a Saturday, we backed the trailer up to the pen and he offloaded easily...piece of cake, right?! So I gave him a day or so to settle in and had so much fun feeding him. Hey, he was kind of cute. Then I went into his pen. He was no longer cute. Rosie had said how sweet he was and how much he loved being brushed and loved on....hmmm, maybe they didn't bring me the right pig I thought as he stood there BARKING at me and pawing the ground like a freaking bull. But ever the optimist I proceeded forward. Then HE CHARGED ME!! Now I have to say that there is nothing funny about a knee high 250lb pig running at you, full blast while barking. What may have been a bit funny was me in full retreat going over the fence backward. Hmm...time to regroup.
The horses were not excited about Wilbert. Well, they were excited all right but not in a good way. My mare April was in the front paddock so had the best view of this snorting...thing...that made these weeee weeeeie noises and barked. She refused to even go into her stall and did not eat for the first week. In general they viewed this...thing...with abject horror.
Fast forward about three weeks time, during which Wilbert and I came to terms with each other (it involved a rake handle applied, gently of course, to his snout, some screaming on my part and a lot of donuts.) I, in all my great wisdom, decided I would let Wilbert out for a few hours, you know, so he could have a break...wow, did you know how fast a pig can run!!!! Holy *#!!#*! The really bad thing about this is how hard I laughed. Not very nice I know, but in all honesty, I was laughing so hard I couldn't do anything. I was literally weak with laughter.
Okay, so, remember how I said Wilbert loooooved horses? He made a beeline straight for the back 40 and the horse pens. Poor, poor, April! Well, no problem, I thought. She is fenced in. Hah, more naivete. That darn pig walked up to the fence of April's stall, (much to her total horror) stuck his snout under the bottom of the wire and lifted. Ping, ping, ping, ping. The 2" staples holding the wire into the post popped out like gunshot, the wire folded up....and he was in!!! (Ummm, oh, hmmm, maybe that was the problem the neighbors had with him) He paused for a moment, seeming to smile and then swung that ugly head around, "ah, my friend" he said, and headed straight for April who was already cowering in the corner. With great delight, squealing and grunting as only a pig can do, he ran for her. She bolted, running for her life with Wilbert in hot pursuit. Around and around her pen they ran, he in delight, she in terror. The other horses all began running in their pens, screaming, as they watched while the "thing" attacked as they had surely feared it might. Now, April was a little mare, only about 14.2 hands, but let me tell you...when she got a straight line at that 5' fence I could see that all the schooling I had done over fences with her had paid off! She cleared that fence like it wasn't there. I finally stopped laughing enough to grab the rake handle and managed to chase Wilbert back up into the barnyard and close the big gate that he couldn't lift up and we all survived that first contact.
He stood by that gate for days though and I never did get him back in his pen. But before he was done there WAS a hole, pig sized, in every paddock fence.
Oops, this was supposed to be about the neighbors and Clovis PD. Sorry, I do get carried away. I'll finish this later.
And then remind me to tell you about burying Ezra.